Monday, November 23, 2009

Questionable Content Department Part Three

I get literally hundreds of e-mail every week at my job being the managing editor of four great metropolitan weeklies. I glance through them several times a day and trash the spam as soon as I recognize it as being what it is.

Recently The Boss installed a new e-mail server and lo and behold my spam multiplied in my in box. Suddenly I had even more messages in Chinese or Russian as well as the usual ads for mortgages, ink cartridges and unclaimed bank accounts and tax returns.

Lovely. Reading my e-mail is like wading through a muddy stream.

But lately the Viagra salesmen have been getting poetic in the subject lines and I couldn't help but start collecting them. Here's a day's worth of the best:

love battery discharge
courage of your weenie
escape rod's alleviation
prevent premature eruptions
ideal for bed marathon
realize all night ambitions
eliminate rod's flaccidity
endless joy of humping
your male pounder won't fail
potion for perfect bouncing
for humping mania
muse for amorous deeds
and
become her drillosaur

I really like the :courage of your weenie" and become her drillosaur the best.

What's in your in-box?

© 2009 by Gordon Michael Dobbs

2 comments:

Josh said...

you should seriously consider opening and reading some of these -- many of them are also poetic inside, just stringing together random words.

as for the crazy amounts of spam you're getting, get a gmail account (if you don't have one already) and filter your RPI account through that. you'll need to know the mail server address, your user name and password. you can reply in such a way that it looks like it's coming from your RPI account, but you'll get to use the google spam filter.

dogboy443 said...

I see a series of t-shirts just based on Viagra spam.